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January 22
10:03 2018

Science has proved that toddlers cannot help their tantrums, unnecessary as they may be, because young brains are wired to be totally selfish and lack the bits that let adults think of others (Blurb)

Whatever folly men display, be it their shortcomings or their vices, let us exercise forbearance and remember that when these faults appear in others, it is our follies and vices that we behold. They are the shortcomings of humanity to which we all belong and whose faults, one and all, we share. Yes, even those very faults at which we now wax so indignant, merely because they have not yet appeared in ourselves.

They are faults that do not lie on the surface but exist down there in the depths of our nature. Should anything call them forth, they will show themselves just as we see them in others. One man, it is true, may have faults that are absent in his fellows, and it is undeniable that the sum total of bad qualities is in some cases very large. But the difference of individuality between man and man passes all measure.

Thank you very much for having held my choice and arrangement of words in high regard in the last 30 seconds, if we all assume that I handcrafted the first 10 lines in this article. Just so you know, I was not born in 384 BC, I never attended the Platonic Academy and I did not die in 322 BC.

There is research to the effect that the average IQ in Africa is about 70, well in the range of the cognitively handicapped, meaning that if we lived in the US we might just qualify for disability benefits. Abraham Maslow must have borrowed some African’s organ of thought when he worked on his 1943 paper dubbed “A Theory of Human Motivation” in which he proposed a motivational theory on a hierarchy of needs. How could he have forgotten to slot assuming at the bottom of the hierarchy, alongside the physiological basic needs? Assuming, which means to accept without proof, deserves to sit comfortably at the bottom of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs whereat it (assuming) can rub shoulders, wine and dine with shelter, food and water.

We need it for our continued survival on earth. It saves us a lot of time and energy that would otherwise be wasted trying to find proof  before accepting whatever is put before us. Look at how we do it so well on social media. We assume that people’s lives are what they present to us and that what they post are their ideas. I still remember that Bruce Nkgakile liked to quote Eugene Bell Jr.’s “aspire to inspire before you expire” but would never acknowledge that he had only borrowed the wisdom and not the brains behind it.

I am not surprised that he has been suspended from the BDP Youth League. It must be Eugene’s heart. I would rather not have the same happen to me, therefore I acknowledge, with no grain of embarrassment, that the first 10 lines of this piece are Aristotle’s wisdom, the son of Nicomachus and Phaestis. What a cognitively gifted man! His mother’s hours of labour pains were all worth it, unlike most of you who are reading this.

Whatever foolishness men commit, let us exercise some tolerance. I beg that we extend this tolerance to reactive EFF, otherwise officially known as Economic Freedom Fighters by the Registrar of Societies in South Africa. As you may all be aware, a bunch of EFF supporters stormed H&M store in Sandton, wrecked it and damaged stock in a protest against an offensive hoodie. Fortunately for H&M, this is an opportunity to benefit from the insurance policy they pay hefty premiums for to cushion themselves against this kind of risk. For this reason, I urge H&M to design another hoodie that reads “Coolest Ape in the Jungle” as a token of appreciation to EFF for their primitive behaviour. Indeed, our ancestors have been well represented.


Unfortunately for some people, jobs are on the line and there is trouble in breadwinning paradise. Let us be reminded that EFF was formed on July 23, 2013 and will be only 5 years old this year. Five years old! A common challenge for all toddlers at this stage is what psychologists call emotional regulation when meltdowns and outbursts are eminent while the children are still learning how to modulate their emotional expression. Who would we be to refute the observations and documented findings of experts in the area of human behaviour? Science confirms it – toddlers cannot help their tantrums, unnecessary as they may be, because young brains are wired to be totally selfish and lack the bits that let adults think of others.

And the ANC is not the only parent to have a child with an attitude problem (think of the BDP and its offspring, the BMD) and even if EFF was older, we all have a little child living within us that sometimes astoundingly manifests without our consent. What can we do!





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